With restaurants and bars reopening, I think we all have the sudden urge to finally ditch the sweat pants and dust off our cute little outfits that have been cooped up in our wardrobes.
Every girl has gone through days when they feel like they dont have anything to wear. And I might have found a solution. might!
Although one size does not fit all, I have some tips and tricks to creating killer outfits to suit your mood and aesthetic.
My solution (drumrolls), Styling websites! My top two include eunic-brussels.eu and eunic-brussels.eu ASOS styling website is also a favourite but ever since CoronaVirus hit, it hasnt been operational.
These websites help you to put together outfits virtually. You get to choose from their collections and take inspiration to style outfits from what you already have in your wardrobe. The best feature of the websites is that you can drag items of your liking and create virtual outfits for yourself, that way you see what works. You can also decide to purchase the pieces you fall in love with from the websites. They feature accessories, bags, different clothing items, jewellery, shoes and everything in between.
Here are some of the outfits I put together to spark joy. Added to cart!
I used eunic-brussels.eu to put these together.
Gochujang is a Korean fermented red pepper paste and this was my first time having it! It is so delicious and has such an incredible depth of flavor that adds something special to any dish. I loved it so much and wanted to learn more about how it is traditionally used! I learned that its popular in Tteokbokki (spicy Korean rice cakes. I love these!), Bibimbap bowls, and Cheese Dakgalbi to name a few ways to use this delicious paste. I cannot wait to cook up more recipes and learn how you love to use Gochujang!
I made a glaze using this paste, honey, sesame oil, and soy sauce. It was so tasty to top on this salmon.
PRO TIP: Make the glaze ahead of time and marinate your salmon for hours before air frying.
These Gochujang Glazed Salmon Bowls are so easy and quick to whip up in the air fryer. I plated it on top of a bed of warm, white rice and sliced up an avocado on the side.
These Gochujang Glazed Salmon Bowls keeps well in the fridge for days after cooking, BUT I doubt you will have any leftovers at all.
Let me know your favorite way to use Gochujang!
Print Recipe Pin Recipe
In a small bowl, mix together the gochujang, honey, soy sauce, and sesame oil.
Brush this mixture evenly over each salmon filet. Reserve half of the glaze for later.
If your air fryer requires preheating, preheat it to °. Spray the air fryer basket with cooking spray. Add the salmon to the basket 2 inches apart and air fry for 12 minutes. Do not flip halfway since the skin tends to stick to the bottom.
Every 4 minutes, re-brush the glaze on the salmon.
Cook the rice according to package instructions. Slice your avocado (be careful!).
In a medium bowl, add half of the rice, half the avocado, and the cooked salmon. Sprinkle on sesame seeds, and serve with seaweed or cucumber if desired. Enjoy!
Let us know how it was!
If you like this recipe and want more, check out my Cookbooks!
Also, if you want to check out these cute milk carton water bottles, here’s a link:
We have started down the road of the CrossFit Games Open and as successfully as our first Friday Night Lights went, I inevitably find myself emotionally conflicted. I’m not sure how to explain what my conflict is. For someone who loves the power of words, I find that I butt up against the inadequacy of language in this case. How do I describe feeling
while also feeling
about what I know will be an exhausting five weeks of fitness.
In poetry, experts call this an objective correlative the artistic and literary technique of representing or evoking a particular emotion by means of symbols that objectify that emotion and are associated with it. Generally, we respond to details rather than the ideas behind the details. If I try to EXPLAIN the emotions in the two pictures above, the explanation will eventually fall well short of the emotional response of LOOKING at the pictures.
How do I capture the objective correlative of the Open in just a few hundred words? How do I write about it in a way that is authentic? How do I convince you that I appreciate how the Open makes our community better and gives us an excuse to come together to celebrate everyone’s fitness while at the same time making me both love and hate everything about the competitive aspect of CrossFit?
Put those questions on hold. We’ll come back to them.
Earlier this week, I read an essay by Robin Dunbar, the author ofGrooming, Gossip and the Evolution of Language. In the essay, and in even greater detail in his books, Dunbar argues that the evolution of language, like the evolution of all physical and emotional traits, is a confluence of external evolutionary factors that selected for and yielded the most effective version of our species based on itsEnvironment of Evolutionary Adaptedness, EEA.
For Dunbar, language was a social technological development that provided a new medium for our early hominid ancestors’ social interaction. Members of almost every great ape species spend an average of 20% of their day socializing. Other than humans, this socialization primarily manifests as grooming, coupling, and fighting. We do that stuff too, but we also have the gift of gab because, as our brains grew, our need/desire/ability for social interaction grew. As that need/desire/ability continued to take up more time of the day, we reached a tipping point where too much time would be spent socially interacting via physical means alone and we’d have less time to hunt, gather, eat, rest, and survive. In response to this evolutionary need, a non-physical equivalent of primate grooming emerged: language.
What we do at Fairwinds is a social experience. For some of us, it takes up way more than 20% of our our daily socialization. But for most of you, I bet if you added up the amount of time you are at Fairwinds, thinking about Fairwinds, talking about Fairwinds, or in some other way involved in Fairwinds-based activity, it probably comes out to 20% or so. This is because we aren’t actually in the exercise business, we are in the relationship business. I’d love to take credit for making that up, but I didn’t.
When I think about the Open, I only really understand it because I’ve experienced it. I feel as if my language can’t quite capture the power the next five weeks have in deepening the relationships we have built within our community. And I feel like one of my most important responsibilities with the gym is to provide an opportunity for those relationships to grow and broaden. I could spend hours writing about how meaningful these next five weeks can be or I could just give you a barbell and let you get there yourself.
So my public-facing narrative for the Open is something like
because “it’s all about the people and the fun.”
But my inner narrative of the Open is more in line with
The Open scratches an itch that I often try to ignore and keep under control. When Open season comes around, I feel an overwhelming need to let my competitive juices flow. This urge, when left unchecked, quickly undermines months of preaching balance and moderation. I hear ….Go and
Before I leave, I decided to do a series of final recipe videos in my favorite kitchen. We made plenty of cocktails, but one I particularly love is the classic Manhattan.
A Manhattan is just about as old school New York as it gets. The origin for this elegant cocktail tends to be a bit blurry after all this time. Dating back to the late ’s, some say it was invented at the Manhattan club in New York City, while others say it all started at the historic Hoffman House. I’m just glad someone invented this brilliant concoction!
Whether it’s a signature themed drink or a time-honored classic, I’m always fully stocked and ready to pour!
A classic Manhattan marries two parts rye or bourbon whiskey with one part sweet vermouth, a couple dashes of bitters, and a cherry to top it all off. When done right, a Manhattan should have a subtle bitterness and some herbal undertones. I like to add orange peel and Luxardo cherries to mine!
If you want to level up your cocktail game, switch from the bright red American maraschino cherries to Italian Luxardo cherries. Like the sophisticated older cousin to your average maraschino cherry, these luxurious cherries have a rich, nutty flavor and they’re soaked in a dark Marasca cherry syrup.
Check out my video below for a fun tutorial!
Print RecipeClassic Manhattan
Course: Drinks
Servings: 2cocktails
Fill a mixing glass with ice. Add whiskey, vermouth, and bitters. Stir for about 30 seconds.
Strain liquid into a cocktail glass over your ice cube of choice. Add a twist of orange peel. Garnish with Luxardo cherries.
Every cocktail lover should have their go-to Manhattan recipe on hand. Whether you adopt mine or make your own, I hope you’ll try this beautiful cocktail at home and let me know your thoughts in the comments section below.
Cheers and Adieu to Fifth Avenue.
Stay tuned for news of my next move.
XO,
Pamela
I’m a pedant.
No, not a paedo. A pedant.
Indeed, I’m unashamedly a pedant.
I’m not a full-blown, grammar-Nazi type of pedant. I understand that sometimes in our rapid-fire social media response environment, the occasional ‘your vs you’re’ oversight is going to happen. In fact I know I’ve done it myself, once.
No, what I cannot tolerate is blatant ignorance or downright laziness, or flagrant Americanisation*
*note my proper English spelling of ‘Americanisation’ vs ‘Americanization’. I will not be gratified by your American mother-tongues**
** Those who know me well, know this to be patently untrue, at least in the literal sense. Which leads me to the first of my pet peeves:
‘Misusing literally’
You say you ‘literally’ could eat a horse.
No, either you ‘figuratively’ could eat a horse, or you’re an obese horse-muncher. Either way, I don’t want to spend any more time in your presence.
‘Irregardless’
Despite the fact that it is not an actual word, can you believe that through sheer volume of misuse, enough thick people have brought this word into the popular vernacular? The irony is the literal interpretation is in direct contradiction to its intended use. In fact it is virtually a textbook example of irony. Prefix ir- and suffix -less, make ‘irregardless’ a double negative, rendering its usage quite redundant.
‘Detail-orientated’
Speaking of irony? Anyone who uses detail-orientated on their resume truly is not, by definition, detail-oriented. Another error in common use that shits me to tears.
‘I could care less’
Irony klaxons sound again. If your intention is to show that you do not care, adopting the phrase ‘I could care less’ shows that you do care, at least a little bit, in order for you to have the capacity to ‘care less’.
Here is David Mitchell explaining it, rather well, along with highlighting some other quaint, American bastardisations:
‘Supposably’
No. While ‘supposably’ is technically a word, albeit an obscure one, context dictates that you really should use ‘supposedly’ every day of the week, and twice on Sundays. Supposedly and supposably are not the same thing. So stop it, fucktard.
‘Snuck’
Sorry, ‘snuck’ is not a word, despite it having ‘sneaked’ into the vernacular. If ‘snuck’ is a sign of the evolution of our language, then I think I’m going to have to become a creationist… or go live in a cave… or both.
‘Expresso’
This is not a coffee beverage, no matter how briskly it is served. And I know you’re not French, so don’t try it on.
People who say ‘arks’ instead of ‘ask’
This really arks me up. What are we, in kindergarten? If I let that slide, you’ll soon be asking me to ‘pwetty pwease, take me the ‘hop-spital’.
‘Could of’, ‘Should of’, ‘Would of’
No, no and for fuck’s sake, no! It’s ‘have’ people!
‘Have’ is a verb. ‘Of’ is a preposition. Verbs are action words. Prepositions provide the relationship between words. For example, “I should ‘have’ run away from the pedant, before he chided me to within an inch ‘of’ my life”. See the difference? If not, you should probably start running.
I understand the complexities of written versus spoken English, in that you may think the contraction ‘could’ve’ sounds vaguely like ‘could of’. Or maybe you’re not thinking at all? That’s a distinct possibility.
The only time it is correct to use ‘could of’, is if you were perhaps to ask:
“Could ‘of’ be used to replace ‘have’ in this instance?”
Even then, the answer is no.
‘Useless Acronyms’
Whenever someone enunciates an acronym that contains a greater number of syllables than the component words from which the acronym is comprised, it helps me to understand why the aliens continue to fly straight past us without stopping in for tea.
A prime example is the “www” used in URL’s. “Double-u, double-u, double-u” uses thrice the number of syllables as “world wide web”. So don’t fucking say it! It’s tautologous once you get to the domain anyway. So instead of leading in with ‘double-u, double-u, double-u dot’, just say ‘pornhub dot com’. Capiche?
Now to conclude (while I’m ranting about acronyms). You know what really gets my goat (aside from goat poachers)?
‘YOLO’
I put the blame for this one squarely on your shoulders, Drake. I hope Madonna gave you rabies.
Dear reader, use YOLO in my vicinity, and you may soon come to realise just how short life is.
One small codicil. I will allow cats to use YOLNT. They’ve earned it. Up-bup-bup-bup-bup. Don’t say ‘earnt’, or I’ll hurt you.
*leans in to whisper*
And listen closely I’ve hurt people before, and not one of them has come back and asked me to please hurt them again…
Over the next five weeks, the many different versions of me supportive coach, competitive athlete, long-time friend, or bitter rival will all struggle for dominance.
And I will tell you that after I do the WOD the first time, I will secretly troll the leaderboard, hitting my refresh button again, and again, and again. Deep down, I will know it doesn’t REALLY matter, but I won’t listen to that voice. I will get sucked into the fantasy of being Top Maybe Top Maybe top 10? Nah, that’s just ridiculous. Is it?
I am left without words, emotionally exhausted, and as I said earlier, my language falls short.
Luckily, at Fairwinds, we celebrate making people better versions of themselves. We try to create an environment where everyone can feel comfortable being vulnerable. We recognize that the process of learning new and difficult things outweighs some definitive level of performance. The people who impress us the most are the ones who push their own limits while keeping things in perspective and honestly celebrating everyone’s effort, including their own.
So I guess I am asking for a favor, Fairwinds.
If, at some point in the next 5 weeks, I seem to be saying
I am sorry.
Or, if it’s after 7pm and I start to
The chicken pesto panino was delicious, tender cuts of meat with a heart attack-inducing amount of mozzarella cheese and an excellent pesto to finish it off. I had some fruit on the side to try and provide something healthy to counteract the massive panini. Great stuff.
Malachi similarly enjoyed his turkey artichoke panini with a pesto salad. I refrained from snatching a taste of his food. But his son got to try some of his dads panino, and seemed to enjoy it.
The words “doting father” might sound trite, but they could easily be used to describe the way Malachi interacts with his son; very playful, keeping a watchful eye on the kid as he wandered around. Similarly, hes very affectionate with his partner. Im not a huge fan of public displays of affection, but I can say their relationship seemed natural, full of humor, and unforced.
But Malachis partner wasnt going to stick around for the interview. By design, the couple keep the world of gay porn and escorting separate from their home life. She left to take their child off to play, and I was able to start the tape recorder.
Even though the two dont talk about his current career, Malachis partner and her first pregnancy is the reason he started doing adult videos for the gay porn website Randy Blue. But escorting came first, a world in which people pay for companionship with typically very attractive men or women, with sex considered by mutual consent and not included in the price of an escort a legal loophole making it a quasi-legal profession. It was primarily crippling debt that pushed him into that industry.
“I was struggling to get above water while waiting tables and doing small time modeling gigs, and it was creating a lot of stress in my life,” Malachi said. He spoke with a gay friend named Carl, a guy who was a former male for male escort turned successful photographer. Carl told Malachi that the “quickest way you can get money is drugs, dancing or escorting and porn.” Malachi had already tried some low-level drug dealing before realizing the risks of jail time far outweighed the financial benefits, and so he started to consider escorting. One thing was certain he didnt want to enter the higher profile world of porn.
The market just wasnt there to be a heterosexual escort, so if he was going to enter the profession; hed have to do it with men. One big problem: Malachis not gay.
“If I was gay, I would be a lesbian, he joked. I didn’t just jump into it. I was going through a lot of emotions mixed with stress and extreme motivation to make something of myself,” Malachi said. So he turned to his friend Carl for advice on what to do.
Carl said that Malachi could probably get by initially offering nude massages to clients, but that some clients would be expecting more.
“Its just a dick,” Carl told Malachi to try and make him comfortable with jerking a guy off. “When you masturbate you’re touching a dick, it’s just another guy’s dick.” Adopting this mentality combined with debt problems and using a substantial amount of pot was enough for Malachi to get over his strong reluctance to doing anything sexual with men.
Carl “coerced me into it and taught me the ropes,” Malachi said, first with a profile on a site called Rentboy on which male escorts can advertise their, well, companionship for sale.
And the name Malachi? He chose it because “I heard it in my dreams, its different and Malachi was a prophet, I guess I feel like Ive got something to say.” A quick Google search confirms the religious background of the name, but the conversation was about gay sex for money and not worship, so the questions went back to his life as an escort.
Through Rentboy, Malachi got several clients for massages, and eventually got raunchier when some of the clients offered more money to perform oral sex on him. “It gave me a weird gut feeling and I couldnt believe I was doing it,” he said. But the financial benefit $ a client was too much to pass up. “While I was working, in my mind I had to just keep saying the amount of money Id make. That got me through it.”
After what he described as a long, rough season of learning and accepting all clientele, including women and lesbian couples, Malachi developed a strategy of taking on submissive non-dominating clients that wouldnt try to force him into doing anything he wasnt comfortable with. “I would only go after the easy clients, that ones that just want to suck my dick or give me a hand-job or a massage. Im kind of spoiled in a way because I can really use my looks and my body” to filter out the more dominant clients that might want to push him beyond his comfort level, he said.
One surprise for Malachi was the high number of straight men with families who would hire him. “I started finding out the truth about people and relationships when I started having sex for money,” he said.
For example, there was the ex-KGB Russian client, a 6 foot 3 inch tall man who would show up to Malachis place with a gun strapped to his belt. “He was a modern day gangster and I kept thinking what the fuck did I get myself into?” But the guy who was married with two children wasnt threatening. He just wanted companionship of various forms.
Other clients were gay, including a male couple in New York who made Malachi their houseboy in Manhattan. That involved hanging around their place, spending time with them and once a day giving erotic massages to the duo. They even took him to the Hamptons out in Long Island for a gay tea party. Thats where Malachi met other potential clients, one who offered to pay him twice what the duo were providing. He politely turned the guy down that night “I was with the couple and I respected them” but he took the mans business card and saw him the following week.
That didnt sit too well with the gay duo from Manhattan, who wanted Malachi to be exclusive to them. “But how do you expect a professional sex worker to be exclusive? Im here to make money and being a houseboy was percent of the time. After a month I couldnt do it anymore. I had no life, no freedom, no girl, I was just bored.” So thats when he switched to one-off meetings with clients.
Malachis escorting got bigger and progressed, and his comfort level with the work increased to the point where he was having full-on sex with men with money. All the time though he saw it as a means to an end, a way to make money to pay off debts.
Then his partner got pregnant and moved in with him. “I told her not to work, I wanted her to be a stay-at-home mom. After she got pregnant I realized I needed to make more money.”
He started scouting around for other ways to bring home cash. Straight porn offered relatively low wages for men, roughly $ for six hours work. But Malachi saw a Craigslist advert from Randy Blue asking for performers to do solo masturbation scenes. He learned that the take-home pay for a few hours of pleasuring himself in front of a camera would be $2, “It was the only way to control my situation with an unplanned pregnancy and stressful debt, and I was already programmed to perform” from escorting.
Malachi performed for a solo video. After it aired, Randy Blue liked what they saw, and offered Malachi $3, for a guy to perform oral sex on him for a video on their site the following month. “They saw lots of money in me and I saw lots of money in them.” So this mutually financially beneficial relationship blossomed, leading into gay porn magazine covers and photo shoots and pushing his earnings into a previously unachievable category.
Being a Randy Blue actor gave him “leverage” as an escort. Now clients werent just going after his looks, they were also paying to enjoy the apparent fantasy of being with a gay porn star. From a few hundred dollars per session, Malachi was now able to charge much higher prices including $2, for an overnight stay or $1, for an out-visit.
The money was good and he certainly hustled. But there was one thought that returned. “There were times where I asked myself, am I gay? Is this just something that Im using as an excuse? And I spent a lot of time exploring that in my mind,” he said.
This was in the thick of his career when he was making close to $25, a month, filming scenes for Randy Blue and hitting five major cities in a week to see clients all over the country (and sometimes the world). Thats a lot of sex. “So I explored if I could actually get turned on by a guy. I tried. But I couldnt. The curiosity was answered and I knew I was heterosexual,” he said.
“I appreciate guys, I appreciate male camaraderie. I know what to appreciate out of males but I have no desire to have sex with them for pleasure. Ive never done anything gay if I haven’t been paid for it. I put on a game face, a facade, a character, and I make money” being gay for pay, he added.
I asked Malachi how much longer he intends to stay in the gay for pay world, especially with the money being so bountiful. “Its great money and a fast lifestyle if your mind and body can handle it. But Ill be so glad to get out of it,” he said.
Malachi wants to make enough money to start some non-porn businesses, and when he hits that fiscal goal hes gone. In the meantime, hes writing a book telling stories about the highs and lows and twists and turns of being a sex worker. And there are stories.
For example, there was a Middle East oil prince who offered Malachi $50, to be a personal assistant for a three month period. Hed have a paid car and be completely taken care of. Good deal, right? Well, Malachi thought there was something a little off about it. From escorting, hed developed a wide range of contacts so he asked one of his clients for a second opinion. The client read over the princes e-mails and warned him that it was an attempt to trap Malachi in a sex slavery ring, in which royalty from another country ensnares someone for a year or two or potentially forever.
Malachi suspected what might happen if he went with the prince, so he devised a plan. The princes assistant picked him up one day in Los Angeles and they went out to Beverly Hills for suit shopping on Rodeo Drive. The assistant even gave Malachi $8, in cash, stuffed inside an envelope. He was meant to meet the prince after that for dinner, but the assistant said there had been a last-minute change of plan and that theyd have to drive straight to the airport and fly out to the Middle East.
This is where Malachis plan kicked in. The car doors were locked, so he asked the driver to wind down the window so he could have a cigarette. The driver complied and the car rolled along toward the airport. Then it stopped at a red light. Not wasting a second, Malachi stuffed the envelope of cash in his pants, threw the burning cigarette on the assistants lap, jumped out the window, and ran.
He kept on running. He could hear tires screeching on the pavement as the driver frantically tried to turn around and catch the runaway sex worker. Malachi rushed to find a hiding spot, climbing a hotel stairwell and staying out of sight on the buildings rooftop for three hours, shaking with adrenaline and fear. Eventually he thought it would be safe to take a peek to see if the princes men were gone. They were. After deleting his email account and changing phone numbers Malachi gratefully realized he got away from what he said was one of the most dangerous escort situations he faced.
That story might make it into his book, which is still in the works although he originally intended to have the book out by December last year after announcing his retirement from the gay porn and escorting world one month earlier. But problems ensued. Writing the book was much harder than he anticipated, and money woes meant he had to step back in front of the camera in January. After that, he once again announced his retirement and was focused on finishing off the book.
Thats when he found out his partner was pregnant again. So money and other needs pulled him back into the escorting and gay porn industry, just as they first got him into it.
Malachi has apparently received some criticism for claiming he “retired” from Randy Blue and the escorting life once or twice before in the past few months. And he notes there is frustration from people who had pre-paid for his book expecting to have read it by now. Malachi is fine with giving refunds to anyone who asks him for one and there have been two such requests but he said most of the people who have paid are willing to wait a little longer, and he wants to deliver.
“I should have waited to announce it later on, I shouldnt have got so excited about it. But I know theres a fun story to write, and it is coming.” Hes fixated on finishing the book by September for two reasons; one, its a contractual deadline to have it out by then, and two more importantly for Malachi “itll be a healing process for myself to get it all out there.”
Given his general dislike for the work that he does and his declarations of quitting, he acknowledged that it looks odd to retire and return, retire and return. But he said each time he finds himself back in front of the camera its because of bills to pay and the need for a quick and easy funding source. Its never because of boredom or a desire to be adored by gay men, he said.
Instead, its just a job for Malachi, who never treated his life in the gay porn world as that of an artistic statement or creative endeavor, and instead looked on it strictly as work.
“Money turns me on, and life without it is off,” he said.
To his critics, Malachi has a simple response. “Fuck yourself.” His more elaborate response, “Everyone has a background, everyone has had problems and everyone has bills to pay.
“For every one that has some debate or that dislikes me there are that like me. People ask me, How can you be straight? You can. Its just like anybody who worked a job they didn’t enjoy. Its like being a laborer. I was not a laborer in my mind when I was working construction jobs. I didn’t enjoy it. Who enjoys 10 hours of construction in the blistering heat and you’re burned out? I did gay for pay for money. It pays a heck of a lot more and it’s a job. I can program myself to do a j-o-b, especially in these hard economic times.”
Malachi filmed his most recent scene for Randy Blue earlier in July, and he says this one will really be his last for them barring the need for more funds.
He said it was stressful getting back in front of the camera, surrounded by blinding fluorescent lights while getting it on with another man. “It was difficult. Theres this intense heat from the lights shining on you, and four crew people are watching you, and its stop-go, stop-go. I had the biggest headache and I came home and I threw up. It fucked me up.”
For Malachi, the experience brought back the lowest points about being gay for pay. “There were times when Id come home sick, I didn’t know who I was.” He said he managed to clear his thoughts up and stay focused by concentrating on the money hed make from a client or video. During those sessions, hed mentally fixate on the various girlfriends he had (which his partner allowed and had often participated with) and earnings in order to get through it.
Still, he had some positive experiences from his career, meeting people from all walks of life and professions and learning a lot about being a businessman because many of his clients were self-made millionaires. “It was so beneficial to listen to their successes and mistakes,” he said.
Now hes focused on getting the book out the way and putting the gay for pay world behind him for good and not as another temporary retirement.
Hes been offered thousands of dollars from a well-known porn producer (not Randy Blue) to do a scene, and an even more substantial sum to do a video that would involve urinating on guys. Apparently that pays well. But not well enough to keep him doing it forever. Hes ready to get out, ready to finish his book and be done with the world of gay for pay. From the start, he made a conscious decision to make an “extreme separation” between his home life and his work life. He also devoted a lot of his time to his family whenever he was off-camera or not with a client.
“A lot of guys that get into gay for pay dont have an outlet like a family, and they get off on people really liking them and/or they have a vice or addiction they need to fund, but you need to have a plan of action,” he said. “Youre going to hit 40 and your sexy looks won’t sell. You have an expiration date.”
Malachi is keenly aware that the sex industry is superficial and that once his book is done and hes permanently retired, people will soon forget him. “In a few years nobody is going to know who I am. There will be a fresh face, a new great looking guy, a new kid in town. Yeah, there will still be Malachi videos, but that will be in the past. Nobody will know where I am or what Im doing.”
What about his family? Suppose one day the Marx children are browsing the Internet and stumble upon information that leads them to discover what they dad did for work?
He sought advice from other escorts and porn actors on how to prevent his children from finding out, and one of those tips was to make a clear separation between his home and work. Even so, most of Malachis family knows what he does even if theyre not too comfortable with it. And if his children find out, he said its kismet and he will explain that he did it as a way to make money for them. “If it happens, its supposed to happen, I love them so much and thats why I do everything I do” he said.
It was time to wrap things up. I thanked Malachi for the interview and said goodbye to his partner, who had since returned. As I was leaving Malachi told me one of his favorite phrases, “Money comes easily and frequently.” It seems like being gay for pay brings money frequently, but not necessarily easily. Still, it appears that the lucrative side wins out.
“Sex sells, thats the truth,” Malachi said.
I am sorry.
Please know that deep down inside, I am really saying
because I am very happy to be doing this Open with the Fairwinds community. I am happy to have a place where I can figure this stuff out and know that, no matter the result of this year’s Open or any other challenge that comes our way, we’ve all got a place to land.
See you in the box.
-Coach Jack
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